Thursday
Feb192004

The Two Shall Become One Flesh

Funny BarbThey say married couples begin to look alike after many years of marriage. I suppose they are right. Who are "they" anyway? - (subject matter for a later post). Now that I have been married 21 years, I can buy alcohol. Yippeee! I may get me some tonight. I may buy some alcohol tonight too, hehe. And it's only Thursday.



People think they know each other when they get married, but they don't. Discoveries are made after the vows have been said. These discoveries are rarely "deal killers," more often they are minor annoyances. When my college roommate got married, I asked him about this after he had been married for a few months. He told me he and his bride had a difference of opinion where making the bed was concerned. Steve held to the school of thought that the print side of a bed sheet faced up, while his wife placed the print side down. She explained it was for when the sheets are pulled back, the print will show. We had fun discussing the ins and outs of this problem, but it looked like there would never be any resolution.



When their first anniversary rolled around, I had an idea. I bought a printed sheet and took it to my mother with a request. Cut the sheet in half. Flip one side over, then sew it back together. This little innovation would solve one point of contention between them. Heck, it could even save their marriage. Steve could have his side of the bed with the print side of the sheet up, while Belinda could have the print side facing down on her side of the bed. They got a big kick out of my gesture and we all had a good laugh out of it.



Just for laughs, comment about what you discoverd about your spouse AFTER you got married that you did not know before you were married?



Barbara's list would be quite long.



Until the next time

John Strain

Wednesday
Feb182004

Anniversary

John and Barbara 1983Thursday marks my 21st wedding anniversary. Damn. A lot of water has gone under the bridge since February 19, 1983. Barbara and I were married in Vicksburg, MS, lived in New Orleans for a few months, moved to Illinois for two years, then landed in New Orleans again. Eventually we migrated to the Northshore area and have lived there since. I was 26 then. Now I am almost 47 and I have a son who is nearly 19. I remember the shower my church held for us. We received so many nice gifts. Barbara's parent's friends also gave us a lot. I remember thinking, "hey this getting married thing is OK, everyone gives you a lot of stuff."



There were some lean years financially, but we made it. We have had our trials and triumphs. Marriage is an interesting experience. We have been fortunate and blessed. Thus far in life, we have been spared a lot of problems. We have always had enough. We have received a lot of help from numerous people. We have experienced many wonderful things. We are blessed with several good friends.



I attended a 50th wedding anniversary last September. I can see Barbara and I at one of those in 29 years. It will be here before we know it if we live that long.



My mother cross stitched a piece for our wedding. It said:





Entreat me not to leave you,

Nor to keep from following after you,

I love you more than yesterday,

Less than tomorrow.





The years continue to tick by like the numbers of an odometer. A few clicks here and a few clicks there. The mirror looks different today than it did then. I can honestly say things have gotten better. They have gone from good to better and I look forward to the best.



What a gift to have someone with whom to share my life. What a gift to have a son. What a gift to be healthy. I have enough sense to know when I am lucky. I am going to enjoy my good fortune while I still have it. One day, things will slip away, but when they do, I will have a heart filled with gratitude for what I had.



As for Barbara, she was warned, but married me anyway. I suppose she has earned a medal. At least those who know us think so.



Those are a few of my thoughts as I approach number 21.



Until the next time

John Strain

Tuesday
Feb172004

Hope



You are not here merely to make a living.

You are here to enable the world to live more amply,

with greater vision,

and with a finer spirit of hope and achievement.

You are here to enrich the world.

You impoverish yourself if you forget this errand.

Woodrow Wilson (1856 - 1924)



It is difficult to say what is impossible,

for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today

and the reality of tomorrow.

Robert H. Goddard (1882 - 1945)



Make no little plans;

they have no magic to stir men's blood...

Make big plans, aim high in hope and work.

Daniel H. Burnham (1846 - 1912)






One thing I have noticed, working with people over the years is the importance of hope. Those without it find it plausible to take their own life. Without hope they lack a reason to "go on." Their future is dark and foreboding. Without hope, their present is meaningless. What is hope? It is no more than an idea or a belief, yet it is powerful. With hope people have attempted and accomplished the impossible. Impossible is simply something which has not been done "yet." Without hope an individual is unable to tap his or her resources. They often give up. Not because they are not able, but because they lack a belief.



Is it not the hope of the weekend that propels you through the week? Is it not a hope of your children's success that makes you work the second job or volunteer at the school. We hope for connections so we get on line or go to places or let our friends "fix us up." Without hope, life would be boring, without possibilities, and all too predictable. Hope is a cousin of dreams and fancy. Hope is the carrot on the stick or the pull to go around the next corner or over the next horizon.



The absence of hope is despair. When I talk to people who are or have recently been suicidal, I will ask them about their level of hope. What is your level of hope? To what do you look forward? What excites and drives you? Do you have a passion? What is it? Life is so short. It is a shame to waste any of it, but that is what happens if our hope dims. Your hopes can be as lofty as landing a robot on Mars or as simple as receiving a hug from your little girl. What you have hope in is not as important as you having hope in something. I also recommend spreading your hope around. The market can take a down turn, people can die, life has a way of assaulting our hopes. But hope springs eternal. Your hope may be down for the count, but it will never be out. Deep within you an ember of hope awaits a thought and a belief to transform the hidden spark into a flame of passion. It is how we were put together - it is how we work.



I invent things to look forward to. I tell myself when I finish this or that, I will get a cup of coffee or a coke for a reward. I look forward to Friday night meals with my friends. It is OK to bribe yourself. Have something to wait for, something you can't have until tomorrow or next week. Do you remember how hard it was to wait and open Christmas presents when you were little? As adults, we do not wait for things, because we don't usually have to. That is why you do not feel like a little kid at Christmas or any other time. You can recapture some of the excitement by building it. Buy some concert tickets for a month or two from now. Rent a hotel room next month. Make dinner reservations next month. Build your own excitement and anticipation.



I hope you do and I hope it works.



Until the next time

John Strain

Monday
Feb162004

Mardi Gras Parades

Olympia Parade Krewe Beads




More Olympia Parade Photos Here



What do you think of when someone says the words "Mardi Gras?" If you are not very familiar with the holiday, you probably think of a crowded French Quarter and a sea of drunken revelers flashing each other as currency to procure beads. While this is a part of Mardi Gras, the bread and butter of the season is the parade. This year there will be 82 parades with 15 occurring on Mardi Gras day. Parades begin two weeks before Mardi Gras and follow traditional parade routes all over the city and surrounding communities.



Parades provide an opportunity to socialize and party. Because there are so many parades and they happen all over the area, chances are a parade will come by either your house or the house of a close friend. Parade parties are everywhere. It is not uncommon to be invited to a party by someone while standing on the parade route. Because the crowd gathers well before the parade, one usually meets new people they often extend their hospitality. "Hey we're having a party at that house over there (he turns and points in some direction), come on by and get some food." Mardi Gras is like Christmas in that people are friendly and open. You are supposed to love everybody and most people do just that.



On the parade route, people mill around and walk along the parade route. Walking a parade route is something the older kids do more of, while the adults are content to stay put. Walking the route is a way to see who is there and connect with friends. We normally have an ice chest with us and wait for the parade. Since my house is only two blocks from the parade route, it is convenient to run back for the restroom if necessary. A place to pee is a necessity or a Mardi Gras parade can be miserable.



Vendors walk the parade route prior to the parade selling all kinds of glow sticks and glow rings. They have their wares dangling from customized shopping carts. They attract kids like magnets. Eventually, an occasional emergency vehicle drives by, then another one or two. The parade is like a summer rain, a drop or two then slowly the drops become more plentiful and a steady rain is falling. It might rain hard for a few moments, then subside as slowly as it began. The parade is that way. The lead vendors and police cars are the sprinkles, then the floats carrying the Krewe's royalty are next with a few marching bands thrown in for good measure. The rest of the parade is the floats lined with people throwing beads and other "throws" as they are called. In between each float is a marching band or something special like bag pipers or the Clydesdales.



Pictured at the top are Olympia Krewe beads. Krewe is synonymous with club. A Mardi Gras Krewe is a club or organization which puts together a parade and ball. They work all year and it is a way to socialize as well as have fun on Mardi Gras. Each Krewe has their own special insignia Krewe bead and it is the prize of each parade. Beads are OK, but not as special as the Krewe beads. People often shake their head and say, "I don't get it, what's the big deal about a bunch of beads?" That person has not been to a parade. Here is how it works. You come to a parade as an unbeliever. You say to yourself, I will not indignify myself by going crazy for a few strings of beads. The parade will start and the excitement will begin to carry you along. Beads will sail over your head and to your left and to your right. You may even catch a string or two. Then someone on a float will make eye contact with you. He will point at you. He will reach for a special string of beads and toss them your direction. You see them coming and you hold up your hand to catch them and just before you grab them, another hand comes out of nowhere and grabs them. The competition will get you. You will spread your legs a bit and extend your elbows to take up more space. You will protect your space like you would box out under the hoop in basketball. I guarantee you the excitement will take you away - it does everyone else.



It is a lot of fun. Before the parade is over you will have more beads and things than you can carry. Once home, people go through their goodies and give away or trade their treasure with others at the gathering. If you have been to several Mardi Gras' you will have a few boxes full of the stuff. I usually give all of my catches to kids at the route.



Float riders reserve special beads for people who impress them in some way. For instance, it impresses them if they see some skin. However, they usually cave in for a blown kiss or a smile or even an exaggerated compliment, such as, "I love you," "I want to have your baby." You get the idea. Men are easy. So if any one in our group is sporting a particular nice string of beads or carrying a large stuffed animal you have to wonder how she, it is usually a she, got it. "Hey, what did you have to do to get those beads?" She will smile and evade the question. All just Mardi Gras fun.



You should try it some time. It is a unique experience you will not soon forget.



More Mardi Gras facts, info, web cams, and more.



Until the next time

John Strain

Sunday
Feb152004

Just A Taste

John By Float




I want to do a proper job talking about last night's Olympia parade and I do not have the time to get it up before this evening. Therefore, I will post a photo and promise more tomorrow. The weather was cold for us. Temp was in the 40's with a stiff wind. The rain stopped just before the parade leaving puddles everywhere. We had the usual good time, talking, laughing, eating, and drinking.



I just finished my run. I ran for 3 hours about 21.5 miles. It feels so good taking a shower after that. I had a nipple blow out. I know I mentioned this before, but the friction of the shirt on the nipple sometimes gets serious. Usually Vasaline protects me from this little problem, but not today. When I finished I looked down at my shirt and the blood soaked through two shirts. The best part was taking a shower - talk about sting. I may have to adopt the band aid protection method. I am reluctant to do so fearing what an EMT might think if I "fall out." They will think I am some kind of pervert. On second thought, what the heck, I am some kind of pervert.



Have a nice Sunday



Until the next time

John Strain