My Life Part XVI: Hello Daddy

After being married just over a year, we began talking about having a baby. It was strange having the discussion. Thinking of being responsible for a baby was interesting sure, but mostly it was scary.

Money was our greatest concern, but we soon decided we would never have enough money. The decision was made to try to make a baby. Barbara stopped taking the pill and we allowed nature to take its course.

I bought a book about babies and learned about ovulation and timing. It was in the summer of 1984 during the Los Angeles Olympic Games when Barbara began to feel different.

Her period was late so we purchased a home pregnancy test kit. The following tells the story about the test.

Hello Daddy

"Hello daddy," those two words set off a silent explosion inside me. All at once I was thinking about the joys and drawbacks of having a child of your own. Everything from playing catch with my son to where is the money going to come from for junior's college tuition.

Barbara and I had just started trying to have a child. It didn't take very long. Several of the signs were present so to confirm our suspicions, we invested in an $8.00 early pregnancy test kit. It resembled a small chemistry set, so naturally Barbara let me figure out how it worked. It was very simple really, a few drops of her processed water and 45 minutes were all that was required. If she was pregnant a little circle would appear in the solution.

I got up and started the test about 7:00 AM on a hot summer day in August. 45 minutes was too long for me to wait standing still, so I opted for an 8 mile run. I remember running along and thinking about all the "what ifs" and possible scenarios. I really hoped that Barbara was pregnant. "Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead" was my attitude. If other people could do it then so could I. I do admit to being a little scared. I guess if you half way realize the responsibility and opportunity that comes with being a parent, you would be a fool not to be just a little scared.

I finished my run and came up the stairs to our apartment. Tim and Prisca were visiting us from New Orleans and Prisca was in the bedroom with Barbara. When I came in things were relatively quiet given the fact that it was morning and Tim was sleeping in the next room. Then Prisca looked at me and said very matter of factly, "hello daddy" and I knew that the circle must have appeared in the chemistry set. Audio version

Things were about to get interesting and we had no idea just how interesting.

Until the next time

John Strain

Nose to the wheel

Yes friends, it is back to work. I had a fun day in Baton Rouge yesterday getting John and Roy set up at LSU, but now it is back to the old grind.

Have a nice Wednesday.

Until the next time
John Strain

No work today; sort of

School has started and the colleges will be back in class soon. I took off today to help my son move some things to Baton Rouge. I have been enlisted to hang a flat screen television for John's roommate Roy and some rerouting of cables.

First things first, I have to run 9 miles, feed the squirrels, and walk the dog.

The anniversary of Katrina is creeping up on us. The other day when I came out of work, it was cloudy and blustery. A chill ran up my spine because it was so reminiscent of the conditions when Katrina was approaching. The news media is making a big deal out of it (the anniversary) and trying to gin up emotions.

They run stories about how people are going to freak out on the anniversary. Let me just say – BS. There is no reason to freak out. The hurricane was a year ago. The time to freak was during the hurricane. If you didn't lose it then; you missed your chance. You should just continue to live your life without emotional interruption.

The news folks would love to have some folks commit suicide or take a gun and mow down a crowd of people due to post traumatic hurricane stress. They are after the self fulfilling prophecies.

An anniversary is a time to remember. No doubt it will stir feelings, but those who get overwhelmed focus on the negative. They will only think about what they lost, how things are different, and how awful all of it is. People will have those feelings, but they should also allow the other feelings to come in. A lot of good has resulted from the hurricane. America opened their hearts and their pocket books to this region.

Katrina brought out the best and the worst in people. Most of us down here have brushed up against both types of people at one time or another since the hurricane. Mostly, people are just trying to get their lives back to some semblance of normal; the new normal.

Many are still displaced or living in trailers. Insurance companies and the government are still trying to figure out what they want to do. People are waiting, working, or moving on.

Yesterday I wrote about how happiness is largely a choice. Freaking out on the anniversary of Katrina is too. Don't do it; it isn't dignified.

Until the next time
John Strain

Are you happy?

Are you happy? If not, what would it take to make you happy? If you are happy, what is it that makes you so?

I see a lot of people each day who are not happy. I deduce this from their complaining. People are constantly annoyed by coworkers, family members or someone else. There is usually a lack of finances to do what they want. Conditions in the world are not to their liking.

The weather is either too hot, too cold, too rainy, or not rainy enough. The government is run by idiots. Everywhere one looks is an invitation to gripe.

I realize some people just need to vent a bit and their complaining is benign, however, sometimes it is a symptom of a deep unhappiness and that is too bad.

The seeds of this topic arose from my recent awareness of some younger people lately who at an age younger than 20 seem to have no joy in life. They are not enthralled by anything. Nothing is cool. On the contrary, everything sucks. Their studies have been abandoned and they lay around their house doing virtually nothing.

What of adventure? Why don't they know there is a great big, beautiful, exciting world out there just waiting to be explored? Where is the enthusiasm of youth?

Are you happy, content, satisfied?

I think that to be happy one must be realistic. In life, there will be problems. Some problems will be big ones. It is only a matter of time until they touch you or your loved ones. So I do not define happiness as an absence from problems.

Since trouble is coming, I revel in the mundane. I am happy, satisfied, and content with the little things. Walking the dog, taking a shower, having food to eat, enjoying friends, being employed are all reasons to be happy. I have known what it is like not to have these things.

It hurts my soul to see a young person with a negative attitude about life. Their gift of youth is a treasure being spent whether they use it or not. If they squander their wealth, they will likely be even more bitter old folks in 40 years.

We get 100 years if we are lucky. Things will never be perfect, but a lot of the things we complain about are more about our ingratitude and inability to appreciate things around us than they are about the situation really being bad.

Much of happiness is choice. We tend to be as happy as we choose to be. Yes we will experience grief, but it only helps us treasure the relationships we do have. We may experience financial hardship, but that teaches us what is important. There is a flip side to everything. Hardship and pain enhance our understanding and appreciation.

As we grow older, we can shine brighter for those following behind us. Our light may illumine the path so others avoid the pitfalls.

I know it's Monday and we may gripe about going to work, but I would rather be going to work than standing in the unemployment line. The weather is hot here, but we have air conditioning.

Look at the suffering around the globe. Compared to so many others, I have it made. I live in safety and comfort. Do I deserve it any more than those living in opposite circumstances? My fortunate condition is a gift that carries with it responsibility. To whom much is given much is expected.

I can truly say that I am happy. I still want things and I complain about things and people like anybody else, but deep down, I know I am fortunate. Some things are results of my work and choices, but a lot of it is dumb luck and God's grace.

Until the next time
John Strain

Wagons ho!

Road trip; destination Vicksburg. We haven't been up there since March and we have missed birthdays of Barb's two nieces and her father's birthday is approaching soon.

I kind of like the change of running scenery and the added difficulty the hills create. Sunday morning isn't for sleeping, it is for running 16 miles. September 3 is fast approaching so I am completing the final preparations for the Tupelo Marathon.

Last year the Tupelo Marathon was one week after Hurricane Katrina and I didn't get to make the trip.

Next week I am going to Baton Rouge to help John move some stuff to his apartment. I am also moving TV cables around and hanging a flat screen for his room mate Roy.

Football is back and the world seems to make sense again. I am more at peace and waves of contentment are washing over me with every image and sound of football. Everything from beer commercials to the referee's whistle are a soothing balm.

I am a traditionalist and do not like the new referee shirts. Leave stuff alone.

Have a nice weekend.

Until the next time
John Strain