Saturday Devotion: Psalm 139

This morning's devotion comes from a book by the title of Psalms Now, by Leslie Brandt. The author beautifully interprets the Psalms and here is one example:

Psalm 139

O God, You know me inside and out,

   through and through.

Everything I do,

   every thought that flits through my mind,

   every step I take,

   every plan I make,

   every word I speak,

  You know, even before these things happen.

You know my past;

   You know my future.

Your circumventing presence covers my every move.

Your knowledge of me sometimes comforts me;

   sometimes frightens me;

  but always it is far beyond my comprehension.



There is no way to escape You, no place to hide.

If I ascend to the heights of joy,

  You are there before me.

If I am plunged into the depths of despair,

  You are there to meet me.

I could fly to the other side of our world

  and find You there to lead the way.

I could walk into the darkest of nights,

  only to find You there

You were present at my very conception.

You guided the molding of my unformed members

  within the body of my mother.

Nothing about me, from beginning to end,

  was hid from Your eyes

How frightfully, fantastically wonderful it all is!



May Your all-knowing, everywhere-present Spirit

  continue to search out my feelings and thougthts.

Deliver me

  from that which may hurt or destroy me,

  and guide me along the paths of love and truth.



Psalms Now, Leslie Brandt. St. Louis: Concordia Press. 1973.



Until the next time

John Strain

The Death Penalty

Derrick Todd Lee was sentenced to death Thursday in Baton Rouge for the murder of Charlotte Murray Pace. Lee is a serial killer and has been linked by DNA to seven murders in Louisiana.



He stalked his victims, raped them, and brutally killed them by stabbing them multiple times. The murders took place between 1998 and 2003. He was previously convicted of second-degree murder for killing one of the women and sentenced to life in prison. This time, he got the death penalty.



The accused are often subdued and act pitiful when in public, but Lee was arrogant and sarcastic. A camera was a cue for him to smart off.



Lee's attorney's argued that he was mentally retarded and should therefore not be put to death. The jury saw through this last minute scam to spare the brutal killer. They only needed 93 minutes to deliberate and decide his fate.



The world will be a better place without Derrick Todd Lee in it. He will not kill again. The death penalty is perfect for cases such as this one. I am glad it exists. I only wish the sentences would be carried out more quickly than the usual several years.



I am not a bloodthirsty kook who wants to see everybody put to death, but I will shed no tears for Derrick Lee. If I shed a tear it will be for his victims, their families, and his family. His death will represent the greatest degree of justice possible this side of eternity.



What do you think about the death penalty?



Until the next time

John Strain

October Trance

One October evening I went walking. I was lulled into a trance by the smell of loam and drying leaves. Like a fine wine I savored the experience; unique, yet connected and very similar to vintages of the past.



Dark and shifting shadows that once concealed childhood fears now hold sweet remembrances of Octobers past.



The cool autumn air blusters around me, and the sound of skipping leaves rises and falls like a crescendo and decrescendo of an ancient symphony. The full moon hides behind foreboding clouds swirling like a witch’s brew in a boiling cauldron.



Death comes alive and ghosts and goblins seem present. They lurk in the shadows so I keep watch hoping to avoid their contact. There! Is that one by that abandoned house? No, it was only some newspaper driven by the evening gale.



For a few brief moments I was 9 years old again, but my trance wore off and I completed my walk. As I passed through my doorway I gave a backward glance. Just, per chance, to glimpse a ghost or some kind of spook. They are always too quick and smart to be seen, but I feel their eyes staring from their hiding places. Through the bare limbed trees the clouds continued to swirl illuminated by the harvest moon. The howl of the wind could be mistaken for a witch's laugh and it animated the night. When I closed the door my October trance ended. Perhaps another time I will once again give my senses and imagination to an October night and I will once again bask in an October trance.



Until the next time

John Strain

Just When You Get a Routine You Like . . .

I have been a little discombobulated the last two weeks. I had a good routine going in which I got up at 5:00 am; had a cup of coffee; and was out the door to run by 6:00 am. My evenings were free, sort of. I went to the gym 2 - 3 times a week to lift weights. Since I pulled my hamstring, I have not been able to run in the AM. Instead, I have been stretching or trying to run, then going to the gym in the evening to put in a running equivalent workout on the orbital / elliptical trainer. That takes anywhere from 45 to 90 minutes during the week and gets me home around 8:00 - 8:30 pm. By the time we eat and watch a little TV, it is bedtime. My blogging time has been squeezed.



The last two nights, I watched movies. Monday was "Man On Fire" and Tuesday I watched "Runaway Jury." These were two good movies. Runaway jury was filmed in New Orleans so it was fun seeing all of the places in the movie I have frequented. Both nights got me in bed near midnight without writing my post and it is my left hamstring's fault.



Life occasionally throws things at us that alter our comfortable routine. Our response is usually to bitch and complain back. While this approach is natural and feels good at first, it does not solve the problem. The situation calls for action and adjustment. I am beginning to realize I may be in this new routine for a few more weeks so I better make the best of it.



I have tried to run the last two mornings, but after a mile or so, the muscle tightens up and I have to stop or risk further damage. It is so nice to be running again but disappointing I cannot run like I was only a week or two ago. I am losing what I worked so hard to build up and there is nothing I can do about it that I am not already doing. This sounds like a job for "acceptance," as in the serenity prayer - God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change . . .



A routine can be a prison or an oasis. In either case, when the routine is disrupted there is unsettlement and a scramble for a new one. All of this leads me back to awareness, appreciation, and gratitude.



Awareness: Aware of how nice things are and how bad they could be.

Appreciation: Appreciating the opportunity and the ability to enjoy whatever it is.

Gratitude: Grateful for what has been in the face of knowing what could be.



So, it will work out in time. My goal may not be completed when I had hoped, but it would not be a challenge or a great accomplishment if it were easy. Some day I will qualify for and run the Boston Marathon. The hurdles in my way will be overcome if it is up to me. So if effort and perseverance are all that are required, it will happen. There are things I cannot control so I won't try to control them.



Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to play the Rocky theme song, for some reason I feel like hearing it at this time.



Hobbling toward a new routine and determined as ever.



Until the next time

John Strain

Columbus Day 1982

22 years ago today, I asked Barbara to marry me. She of course said yes, and here is the story.



I was 25 years old and a seminary graduate. I was still living on campus in New Orleans and taking a few classes until I could find a job. Barbara and I had been dating for a year and a half or so and we had pretty much decided we would be together.



Her birthday was in September and she just knew her gift would be an engagement ring. When it was not, she could not hide her disappointment. I told her I did not want to rob us of another special day by popping the question on her birthday. That bought me some more time. I needed the time, because I had a jeweler friend looking for a diamond. He finally found a nice 1/2 karat stone and was putting it in a traditional setting. The whole thing cost $600.00, which may not sound like much, but it was a lot on a student income.



My friend lived in Mobile, Alabama and once the ring was finished, he was going to mail it to another friend of mine who lived in Kenner, LA, a suburb of New Orleans. There was a delay for some reason and Barbara was having difficulty waiting, while I was running out of BS excuses for not having the ring.



Finally, the ring arrived at Richard and Lisa's house. It was a Tuesday. I do not drive because of my poor vision, so I had to come up with a reason to go clear across town to see Richard and Lisa. I do not remember what that reason was, but Barbara went along. Once there, Richard slipped me the ring and we left after a brief visit.



Here is a portion of my journal entry for that evening:

I left the dorm room at 9:30 PM with a ring and a speech. It would be 4 1/2 hours before I returned, but I returned officially engaged. We walked toward the chapel and I said, "That is a big building," to which Barbara responded, "That's God's house." I talked of how it symbolized worship, God, community, and fellowship. These were the important things in our lives. We sat between the pillars just to the left of center. The moon shone through the clouds above as the wind gently moved the trees around creating dancing images against the October 12th sky. We sat on the steps my arm around her and we talked further. "Tim and I were talking about unique ways to propose the other day," I said. "He told me about a guy who put the ring in his fiancée’s salad. If I did that with you, you would probably eat it and I would have to ram my arm down your throat to get it back." I told her about fancy restaurants and how that would be romantic. I told her that would be fine if it were just the two of us getting married. "But there are three of us," I said, "You, me, and God. So I have chosen this place. I love you both very much and I am asking you both to marry me." With my right hand i held up the ring, which was on my little finger. I took it from my pocket just before we sat down. Holding it up to her, I said, "Here is the tangible expression of my love." Her reaction was perfect for my part. She gasped and her mouth fell open. She was trembling so much she could hardly put it on her finger. For a moment, the light in her eyes out shined the shine that the diamond made under the chapel lights. She still had not given me an answer, even though it was at this point, academic. She tried to be funny by first saying no, but when I tried to grab back the ring, she reconsidered and said yes. After a few brief but intense hugs we went back to the dorm so she could show it to her girl friends and then later head to Shoney's for coffee.

Leavell Chapel at New Orleans Baptist Theoloigcal Seminary



John and Barbara, February 19, 1982





The years have smiled on us. We will have been married 22 years this coming February 19. Our son is 19 and has brought us immeasurable joy. We have been blessed with friends and jobs. Instead of remaining a minister, I became a counselor - Barbara is a counselor too.



If I had it to do again, I would. I loved her then and I love her now. I am not the best at expressing my emotions short of touchdowns and home runs. It is easier for me to write what I feel. I need to work on that in the next 22 years.



Every Columbus Day I think of that night and how it changed our lives. There are a few times in a life that are pivotal - this is certainly one of them and when I recall the moments I still feel butterflies.



Until the next time

John Strain